Enter the world of Robert D. Wilson, a world far different than anything you've experienced or read before in any language. A world that reveals Wilson's soul and mind from the inside out. Everything's true, nothing's made up. A place where Wilson reveals his daily thoughts, feelings, memories, and more. The rides are free, many are scary, and it's a place I wouldn't take my child to visit. Nothing here is what it seems. ©2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
april 21, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
April 5, 2010
The other day on Facebook, I asked a well meaning question that, to my surprise, lit the embers of a woman who made it her mission then and there to chastise and deride me publicly, even those she's never met or spoke with me publicly. I'd read a chapter in the 1970's in the book, Utopian Motherhood, that has plagued me ever since. The author talked about the public's perception of artists. He said many non-artists, those seduced by the media into following the herd to feel a sense of belonging and safety, think of artists as mentally unsound, oftentimes disturbed, rebellious, abnormal (whatever that means) and eccentric, if not teetering on the edge of madness. Most artists, those not using this year's popular colors or colloquialisms, are free spirited people who view life differently. To them, if everything were black and white, there would be no need for art, as art is not black and whit. It sets no boundaries. It's akin to being a crew mate on the Starship Enterprise, exploring an eternity without end, never knowing where it will lead them Picasso could never do what he did at the turn of the 20th Century when he followed Nietzche's advice, destroying beauty to create a completely alien kind of beauty, in life and in his relationships with women, as one of Cubism's pioneers. What he did in the beginning of the 20th century was light years away from anyone's norm, then or now. At first he paid the price for his so called social deviation, the object of ridicule and ostracism, selling few paintings, and thought of as an insane young man. Yet he was secure enough in his ability to see and feel what most do not sense or see, that he continued what most called a downward path, yet he forged a new path for the art world, and his paintings before and after his death cost millions of dollars to purchase, and crowds at modern art museums but tickets in advance to attend showings of his original works. In a period of 12 years, beginning at the age of 14, he went from painting Primera Comunion to Avignon. Picasso left home and went to Paris, a haven at the time for intellectuals, poets, writers, open minded artists, and rich people , who if you were lucky to have one as a fan, could support you until you made it on your own. I don't believe in luck. You have to go after it and make it happen. Some people sell their souls, like a dance teacher lover of a relative who lover in order to survive had to do sexual favors for the woman who was elderly. We've all done things that weren't kosher to get what we wanted.
you are nothing, and being nothing
you are everything. That is all."
I used to compare myself with others and felt inferior because they in a way were my gods. I started surfing after I graduated from middle school (Grade 8). It was a great summer and I had a lot of good friends. People introduced me to other peope who in turn introduced me to others who were popular. I dated a lot, was a weight lifter, and enter the local dance contests, won at most, and even danced in contests on the Sam Riddle Show. That summer was over before it started. On my first day at High School (9th grade) I hung with a crowd of surfers who literally worshipped a guy in the 12th grade who who was a top surfer, owned a woody wagon, and had a way with the girls. I did this for a few days until I heard him talk to a buddy in a low voice, "I wish these wannabe leeches would stop following me." I learned a lesson that day: to be myself and never walk in another's shadow. And to be yourself, you has to be true to your heart. I can't be you and and you can't be me. Each of us are who we are. Hanging out with a popular person is like
a kite, and you do not not know
what it will bring back, a new
life, a new friend, a new love,
a new country."
she tells me, pretending
timeless, her
voice a changeling . . .
summer night
the circus
today was usurped
by rain . . .
the clowns on our floor
watching cartoons
ahead . . .
the half life of dusk,
shading trees
why she played
god and wrestled
the wind,
i'll never know . . .
canyon echoes
the moment
between codas . . .
breeding words
i am at
times unlike the bible
i don't read . . .
a man trapped inside
the bathroom mirror
can stone and
dew share a petal?
fencing words
i prefer
the solitude
of calm . . .
a theater of
song without thought
your mind . . .
plays vibes in a pasture
of egrets
bent over,
she listens to the
cadence beneath
the soil, singing it'd
way to the ocean
ipod and
bird song; sweet the
empty minf
my fee
love the caress of
wet fingers . . .
just a dream,
chides icarus
wind, you
flatter me with touch . . .
those thoughts!
a fool to
think you could love me,
an old man . . .
inside a circus mirror
writing poetry
paste this words,
sun, into your
reflection
am i in
dali's painting of the
toreador . . .
erasing memories
with rainbows?
dragonfly . . .
carry my dreams across
the ocean
who's real
in the volcano's
bowels . . .
brown skinned children
bowing to the reeds
laughter . . .
tiptoes past a
reticent moon
her feet,
like the egret's,
a still life
painted with breath
on a bamboo screen
our puppy
visits in the dreams we
can't remember
one more time,
the tic tock of dali's
twisted clocks . . .
erasing the fence between
dreams and reality
at dawn,
when dreams rest . . .
our breath
in the
kitchen at dawn,
stirring the
puzzle's missing piece
into a cup of moon
shed your leaves,
tree, i want to see
all of you!
will the moon
dance tonight when
wolves howl . . .
their pitiful songs;
the sky pouring milk
cicada,
is she worth dying for?
windsong
pigmy deer
trod through the meadow
of my dream . . .
led by a shaman
shaking a sage brush
walking
past lantern fish . . .
short night
day she
returns to the church . . .
wearing blue denim jeans
starless night . . .
i close my eyes, sifting
silence
robert d. wilson
©2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
March 16, 2010

her hair . . .
thoughts forgetting
some day
where did the
sun and moon go?
in my world.
i walk through words
painted with emotions
the sun and
the doors it hides . . .
stolen seed
targeting who?
the man on the moon,
or, the man
you married and left
to sip alone with clouds?
the abyss
below me, smiles . . .
sleepless night
how did it
feel raping my mind,
magic man?
was it better
than raking leaves?
this morning
our dog beat the rooster . . .
high notes!
sordid, the
changes in your
persona . . .
ants on parade
carrying locusts
be my friend,
tree, teach me when
to shed
two more
days without slumber . . .
my love, a
spoiled child, playing
with barbie dolls
arid noon . . .
50 tadpoles racing
to the moon
there's hope . . .
her shoulders slump,
walking to
the car; a tea leaf
skimming emotions
addicted
to flirting with weeds . . .
summer drought
have i gone
too far, living in
a world,
without bubbles;
every wall a bargirl?
on the moon,
elbowing rosehips . . .
melon seeds
when autumn
strips me of leaves,
and silence
loses patience . . .
a still life egret
she asks the
poor monk for a loan . . .
twilight dusk
why the call,
when angels have wings,
and buddha
eats popcorn outside
a videoke bar?
render me,
an echo that yells . . .
canyon walls
gud a.m., po.
how can i answer
an angel . . .
swimming in the
pasig river?
a young boy
rides a two wheeled trike . . .
into dusk
today, the
same games, back and forth
through a net
like a goldfish
blowing bubbles
the warm sound
of words falling from
granite stone
a dream
free falling into
the mouth of
a python, wearing
a latex mask
chopping yams . . .
the sushi lady
thinks of home
if i'm
the jerk you say
i am,
stuff me inside
a circus canon
lunch time . . .
his angel stares at
spring onions
she's back
in the main arena . . .
my heart's eye
on the high wire
balancing to bows
buddha says
to want nothing . . .
christmas lights
buddha, i
like you as a man,
not a statue . . .
staring past the poor
without expression
summer warmth . . .
another day in
Manila
all, it seems,
want this and that . . .
friendship,
a toddler who
never learned to share
do i wait
alone for death?
dry leaves
it's good to
wake up to a cock's
aria . . .
the coolness of wind
chasing clumps of cloud
robert d. wilson
©2010

